SPEAKER_04 0:00

Here comes the sand do. Here comes the sun the face. It's all right.

SPEAKER_01 0:19

Hello, Fortitude Audience. Thank you so much for being with us today. My name is Heather Kittelson, and I am your host. And I am here with my husband, Amos. Hi. We are kicking off season three with one of my favorite people. Literally one of my favorite people. Someone I have admired and loved for almost a full decade. And yeah, you were a mystery to me, Rebecca Scott. I like to keep it that way. I've said that to you multiple times. That I just I admired you from afar for so long, not realizing that we only lived five miles apart, which is right there. Yeah. So what a blessing that God has brought us together on a friendship level. And we just we share a lot of things with even our kids, similar ages. Our husbands are pretty dang awesome. We have incredible husbands. Agreed. And um we just we have such a passion for the Lord and a spunk and a fire that uh a lot of people will say that. And the last time I looked, we had a picture together and someone said, You two almost look like you could be sisters. So I was like, best compliment ever. Oh so thank you for your time. Thank you for being here today. We're really really excited to have you. Me too. This will be fun. So share with our audience who who is Rebecca Scott. Let's not make it a mystery anymore.

SPEAKER_03 1:43

Oh, well, I feel like I'm a very open book, and if you Google my name, you'll find a lot of things. So I'm probably not as much of a mystery as as some may think. Um, I am Rebecca Scott and I live on the tri-state border right by Valley Springs, which is not very far from Heather. I grew up uh West River, which is a total thing in South Dakota, as we know, uh, from Philip. And then um my last two years of high school, we actually moved East River. My dad says we moved to Greener Pastures. Um, and I finished there and then I went to school at SDSU. But the funny part about that is, or part of the story, as I know with listening to all your podcast episodes, is that that kind that experienced helped shape my entrepreneurism, if you will, because I watched my dad go through this falling out with his dad after 45 years of farming and ranching. You know, when you're a ranch kid, like you're just married to the land. Like this is what we do, and this is what we love. And there we were in like three days' time packing up the horse trailers and moving. So with no job, no school, and no home. Wow. But we moved uh in with my grandparents. I mean, I'm not saying my parents were completely, you know, crazy about it, like there was a plan, but I watched that unfold and went, wow, like people can change, like uproot, change things, uh, put put feet down and no, no more, you know. And I I super like I didn't know it at the time, but now honor so much and so much respect for what my dad was like, enough.

SPEAKER_01 3:09

Because that generation just you know, put your bootstraps on and figure it out, and and and he had just just had enough. And to protect his family, it sounds like to protect all you all to get you to a better place. Yeah, it was way more layered than that.

SPEAKER_03 3:22

It was a it was not a good place for him. It was okay for us, but I think for him to make the choice for himself was pretty powerful. Really powerful.

SPEAKER_01 3:30

And when you say West River, East River, for those who are listening all over the world, it's interesting because people that they automatically assume South Dakota is the monument, the presidents in the Black Hills. They all are like, wait, there's a rushmore. Thank you. I you knew I was searching for it, didn't you? The monument. But people do. They think that that is South Dakota and that is what we stand for. And it's like we're way on the other side of South Dakota. In the biggest city of South Dakota.

SPEAKER_00 4:05

And it's a really pretty side of the state. Really nice, hilly, beautiful. And then the Missouri River runs right down the center of South Dakota. So that's why we call it East River, West River. And there really is, it's like there's a visual difference in that side of the state, right?

SPEAKER_03 4:18

Oh gosh. There's so many differences. It should have been East and West Dakota.

SPEAKER_02 4:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 4:23

Um, but it is a big thing. I mean, in our gas stations, we have t-shirts that say us and them. Really? Yes. It's all my siblings own them. We're like, yeah, to work, work. And when I when I when I moved here and I visit with people and then they get to know me, and then I they say, you know, where you're from, and I say, I'm from Phillips, South Dakota, they go, West River. Like somehow everything makes sense now. And I'm like, well, what does that mean? So I I don't know, but it it can like profile you very quickly. They're like, oh, now it makes sense.

SPEAKER_01 4:57

Rancher? Maybe it's the rancher in you.

SPEAKER_03 4:59

No, I think it's the I think it was how outgoing we were too. And I think, you know, I don't know, but they were definitely like, oh, you know, or the or my East River friends would introduce me and be like, yeah, she's from West River. I'm like, what the fuck? But I'm still really proud of it. I'm like, yeah. I mean, and I I love that I have both sides of the experience. So any anything that I did, any sport, any music, any activity, it was really fun because I knew people from both sides. So I'd be hugging my competitor, and my current sports team would be like, What are you doing? I'm like, I'm sorry, I know them from church camp. And I'm like, we sat around a campfire together. And then they're like, we don't care, we're about to beat them. Like, oh, okay. So it provided unique experiences being able to experience both sides of the state in um different cultures, if you will.

SPEAKER_00 5:44

It's more ranchy on the west side. Like you call it you call it a ranch, right? Cowboy hats and horses and ranch. And then over here on the east side, it's more farm and trucks and like a corn seed hat. Sure. Less sure.

SPEAKER_03 5:56

Less cow cowboy cowboy. We call them rhinestone cowboys. Ooh. I'm so sorry. That's probably insider knowledge, but like if you're wearing a cowboy hat, but you've never been on a horse, we're like, I don't know about that.

SPEAKER_00 6:06

Like, not a real thing.

SPEAKER_03 6:08

I've had way less judgmental about that. But yeah, there's just a difference in obviously commodities, you know, like quite literally in lifestyles, um, uh less competitive out there. Um, so the way that I've succeeded, I think, too, is because it's a little bit more competitive, just more people in the in the nature of um the speed of things on the east side of the state is different than the nature out there. Yep.

SPEAKER_00 6:29

So that was a so that's a big change for your for your parents. Oh gosh, yeah. Yeah. Not just something.

SPEAKER_03 6:35

My mom was born and raised though, East River. Okay. So she loved trees and that kind of thing and the community and that sort of thing. Um, my dad had some adjusting.

SPEAKER_00 6:42

And how old were you when you moved? 17. Oh, so you were, yeah. You were spent like nine.

SPEAKER_03 6:47

What birth order are you? I am the baby by a minute. I have a twin sister.

unknown 6:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 6:52

But let's go there. But I I'm the firstborn. Like, I'm the bossy one. Like, for example, I shouldn't paint this as my first thing that I say. I'm bossy, is I was domineering twin, is what they say, because she is most likely left-handed, but every time she put the pen in her left hand, I was like, you have it in the wrong hand. So I would take it out and put it in her right hand because I wanted her to fit in so bad. It's like, no, don't do it wrong. So she is right-handed now? She's right-handed now, but she's very she can write with both. Okay. And she played sports with both, and I'm positive it was because of me.

SPEAKER_01 7:24

So sorry, Sarah. You two have such a beautiful relationship. I would not, uh unless you two were standing right next to each other, I would not know your twins.

SPEAKER_03 7:33

No. Well, our mannerisms and the exact same. Yes. So people be like, gosh, I feel like I should know you. And then I'll say, Oh, well, do you know Sarah Jensen?

SPEAKER_01 7:41

They're like, Yes, I'm like, that's my twin. So then they know. She's she is spunky. She's spunky like you too, which I love. So you mentioned Church Camp already, which I love, because this is how you met your husband. Can you tell me about your life now?

SPEAKER_03 7:56

Um I sound designed purses and accessories. Is that what you mean? What my life looks like now? Yep. Because Nick is Nick is in it. Yes, I married Nicholas. I met him at Church Camp when we were, well, I was 13. And I saw him and I got, or he took my bags to my cabin, which is kind of funny because at our wedding they said he would carry a lifelong or he would have baggage the his entire life because I make bags now. It's like that's funny. It started with a bag. But it started a bag. Um, and anyway, so we farm and ranch now. Here we have livestock and corn and soybeans and a construction business as well. And then I sew right on our farmhouse in my studio.

SPEAKER_01 8:36

Yes. Which your purses are very they're very well known. I think so. Yep. And you ship out a lot of purses, which we will get into that in a second. Okay. Um, and you have four kiddos.

SPEAKER_03 8:49

I have four kiddos, a senior, an eighth grader, a sixth grader, and a third grader.

SPEAKER_01 8:56

When we were going through what what we had gone through, I remember Amos saying, Do you remember meeting Rebecca Scott? And I was like, Yeah. And he goes, I think you should reach out to her. I think she has some some pretty solid things in life on why she's successful. And I feel like she'd be a great mentor of yours. And you know why?

SPEAKER_00 9:20

It's because you're a podcast.

SPEAKER_01 9:21

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 9:22

Do you still record that in your closet?

SPEAKER_03 9:24

Uh no.

SPEAKER_00 9:24

Did you ever record in the closet?

SPEAKER_03 9:26

Slight upgrade.

SPEAKER_00 9:26

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 9:27

Uh no, I had phone course set up though. Okay. Real professional.

SPEAKER_00 9:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 9:31

Um, no, I just I still recorded in my studio someday. Some I mean my my sewing studio. Let's correct her. Not a podcast studio, but a sewing studio. Yeah, I set up a microphone and what's your podcast name?

SPEAKER_00 9:40

The encourager. Yes. And it was because of the encourager when we were going through things, you needed encouragement.

SPEAKER_01 9:46

I did. Okay. Yeah, he told me I needed to listen to you. And and hi he said, I highly encourage you to listen to Rebecca Scott's podcast, The Encourager. And so I did. And then I did. I listened to it quite a quite a bit. And I just remember I was falling in love with you. It's just everything about what you represented. And I thought you Amos was right. I'm glad I listened to him. So good idea. Um okay, so the the transition, since you said you're the you're the baby of the four, so let's talk about your siblings. I would love you and I, because of the the we have multiple things in common, but this whole what your family went through with your brother in suicide, you have been an advocate in a couple different ways that I would love the audience to hear. Um, but but can we talk uh about your brother and get into the story of what unfolded with your family?

SPEAKER_03 10:47

So we made that big move. Um, my two brothers were already in college um and attending there. And my oldest brother, uh Philip, suffered with addictions, I mean, as early as high school. Uh, I think to this day, and my siblings, I think, would say the same thing is he had a really gift of discernment. He would walk into a room and know immediately this one is sad, this one is mad, this one is happy, and this one, and then he would set to like change things, try to shift perspectives and um cheer them up and just like a really great guy. But it became really overwhelming too, how much feelings he could feel for other people. So I think his addiction started with a way to cope. I don't know this for sure, so forgive me, Joshua and Sarah if you're like, no, that's not what I think. But that would be my conclusion now is like he just so sometimes he would become reclusive because it was like it's too much. It's so much to understand people on a level they sometimes didn't understand for themselves. So uh suffered with some of the different um addictions and things like that, and a couple of them landed him in prison. And so we had oh, we had some Christmases where we went to prison and got him a can of coke, and we were the I mean, not on purpose, but we were kind of an entertaining table, if you will, while we sat there because humor is very important to us. It's probably also a coping skill, but darn it if it isn't a good one. Like, you know what? If you're gonna cope though, humor is a good one. So um, those were some difficult years, really difficult, especially now as a mother. I'm like, wow, wow, wow, wow, wow, how does my mom and dad, how did they process that?

SPEAKER_01 12:18

But um did it did it start? Was did did you see behaviors in high school?

SPEAKER_03 12:23

Like, did you see I didn't, but you know, at that age, I'd like to think we're all like that, but particularly me and Sarah were just in our own worlds, so and we didn't visibly see anybody fighting or anything like that. So I think I was aware that he was a really cool guy and everybody loved Philip, uh, but I didn't know about the addictions then. It was my junior and senior year when we got the phone call about him going to court that I was like, what do you mean? What's going on? So which is so did he stay West River? No, he did move with us.

SPEAKER_00 12:56

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 12:58

Well, because he had his own place by then and everything like that. So, anyways, a couple different stents there and he got out, but those addictions still plagued him. But he actually beat some of the ones that people don't often beat, which is meth. And he he beat that. He was not addicted to meth or stayed clean. But and that's the only reason why that happens because he loved God. Like his Bible was my dad still has it. It's amazing, it's completely filled in. Like, and at Christmas time, he would repeat the Christmas story, the whole Christmas story word for word. So that's kind of cool. I miss, I wish we would have recorded that so we could hear his voice. But um, so, anyways, man of God in prison for addictions, which brings me to another subject of like, if I ever got politically involved, which probably would not happen, but I would hope for legislation to get users out of prison and into facilities that can help them with the addictions and why they're actually there, because they're overcrowded mostly because of users. And I don't know that for factual, sure, but we obviously have a prison problem. And so to put someone as tender-hearted as Philip in a hard prison for multiple, multiple reasons of if we could have got a better lawyer, all those things, and people throwing him under the bus and how our legal system works and stuff, he should never have been in there. Altered him in ways that weren't great. And so I just that that part we all mourn is like, man. I wish that wouldn't have had to be part of the story.

SPEAKER_01 14:21

How many years was he in prison? Like a culmination of one of them was 14 months long.

SPEAKER_03 14:26

I'm not sure about the other one.

SPEAKER_01 14:27

Okay. Yeah, we did some prison ministry uh up on the hill here in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, and there was a lot, a lot of it all stemmed back to stuff that came out or they did while they were under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Sure. And being like, I don't remember even doing that, you know? And so lifelong, we're talking life in prison for something that they're like, I don't even I don't remember doing it. I don't even think I did it, you know. Like we would hear a lot of horrific things that I just kids.

SPEAKER_00 14:59

Yeah, kids. Kids in in blue uniforms.

SPEAKER_01 15:03

Yeah. So how how old is Philip at the point where you guys are starting to notice some darker behavior of sadness and like just depression and stuff?

SPEAKER_03 15:16

Um, he I don't know. So Philip is eight years older than Sarah and I, so I must have been 18 when I started realizing, like, okay, we've got some stuff here. And then in my early 20s, like always just worried about him. Everybody's worried about him. Um, I should say this too. I just feel like I have to. Um, my siblings and I are super close, probably abnormally close for what siblings are. Like we speak to each other almost daily, including my brothers, including when Philip was in or out or whatever the scenario was, we stayed very close, which you would think it would divide us. Um, but it didn't. And that's just a God thing. But it brought us closer together. And so I knew Philip very well because I had a flexible job working from home with the kiddos, where I could call him when I was sewing and say, hey, what's the latest? What are you working on? That kind of thing.

SPEAKER_02 16:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 16:03

Um, my other brother was on the road, so I could call him and see what's going on. Sarah was in school, so I'd have to wait till she got out of school, but we were very, very, very connected, um, both emotionally, physically, and mentally, just knew each other really, really, really well. So picking up on his um tendencies was very easy because I would know, like, okay, he's drinking. Um, and some things he went through a really volatile, I shouldn't say volatile is not the right word, a messy divorce, which I'm sure those two sent those two words always go in the same sentence. I don't know that any of them are clean. But um, there was no closure for him. And that, of course, with his discernment was really important that there's a bow on it, that this has ended, and she did not let him have that. So that just was nine at him, just nine at him that he couldn't have some sort of closure from it. So I knew the addictions would flare during that time. And one time I was traveling home from running errands with the kiddos, which is part of my system that we can talk about. And I I had bought this hat for him. We shared an affinity for fashion and loved it. I bought this really cool Fedora hat and I was gonna give it to him. And I was traveling home. Like I was on the Brandon Road, I was like close to home, and it was like, go give the hat to Philip today. And I was like, Oh, I'm not gonna do that. And then I'm like, Is that my thought or is that God's thought? What's going on? And then I just felt it really strong. So I had two kids in the car seats, I turned around on a field approach, went back into town, knocked on Philip's door. He was living in Sioux Falls at the time, and he answered the door and he was tremoring really, really bad. And I said, Oh, I wanted to give you a hat today. And he said, Thanks, sis, and I knew right away, I'm like, what's going on? And he said, I'm I'm trying to sober up. So he had been sober for I don't know how many hours, but the body craves it so bad that they go into this kind of shock. And I was like, What do you want me to do? And he said, Well, I ate some pasta to try and like he was doing kind of all the excuses are like not really excuses, he's trying to tell me like this is this is what happened, A, B, C, D, like this is what happened. How can you help me? And I was like, I feel like this is out of my hand. I think we need to call. I need to just take you in. So I called my parents and they advised the same thing. So I took him to the hospital. And it's one of those moments where as a little sister he stood in front of the attendant, and she was kind of dismissive because she knew he was an addict. And he said, I'm here to admit myself I have an alcohol problem. And I knew that his whole like adult life, but to hear him like throw his shoulders back and have to like claim it was just weird.

unknown 18:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 18:40

But stood right by him, stood right by him with a kid on my hip and holding another kid's hand. And I was somehow like proud of him for saying, like, I need some help. So then they took him back. I called my dad, my dad came down, and then we just sat with him, not a lot of words, but just sat with him because the truth was he was desperately trying to get sober, but it is such a gripping disease that you cannot you need help. And so it was like Philip, we like there was no shaming involved or anything like that, because at that point the disease is just um I don't know how to say it, like maybe objective, but you're like, here's Philip, and then here's the disease, and we're gonna go through this with you, like whatever it takes. So I can't remember what they gave him or what the procedure was there. But then after that, came to my house and we came up with a plan alongside my parents and my siblings is like, let's get him into a rehab. And this is not his first time in rehab, but this was an in-person rehab. And that one did that bought us some time. So that was good. And he uh was there and we visited him frequently and played the little yard games with my kids right there and everything. So that was I don't know for sure because sometimes you want the memories to get fuzzy, and thankfully we're 10 years out. So we reflect more on the good stuff and less about the process of the addiction and stuff. So I can't remember if the hat occurrence was the one that led to the um inpatient care, or there was he came out to my house to do laundry and he was playing beanbags with Gus, who was like five years old, and he went to toss it and he flexed, whoops, he flexed his arms out and he had a seizure. And I had said right before that, I was like, we both tremor really bad because of blood sugar and stuff like that. So I'm like, hey, do you need a ham sandwich or something? He's like, Yeah. I went inside to make that, and then when I came back out, I noticed his hands jumped, and then he had a seizure right there in front of Gus, who I mean, that was like his hero. So then I man, I didn't even know he would go here. I was holding him on a gravel road, just screaming um for help and asking God for just like please just buy us more time. And called an ambulance. The ambulance came, uh, not an ambulance, forgive me, an emt on a motorcycle came who was also drunk.

SPEAKER_01 21:03

Oh dear.

SPEAKER_03 21:05

He was an on-call EMT. He was an on-call EMT who arrived drunk, and I could smell it from him. And then I'm looking at my brother who's who's past the seizure point. Um, I knew enough from my lifeguarding years of what to do-ish, believe me, I'm not educated at all, but I knew to put him on his side, and so he did survive the seizure, obviously. Waited for the ambulance. I was like, and I looked him straight in the eye. I'm like, you can't help him. You are in the same boat. And he was like, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm like, oh my gosh, is this like the twilight zone? Like, what? So then another ambulance came and we actually told that ambulance to leave um that we could take him and then made the phone calls and got him into inpatient care pretty quickly after that. But again, that was a seizure from desperately trying to get sober. And I think he was at 24 hours then. So it's those like just drying, they're gripping it so hard. And the person on the phone told me to give them a beer because it helps get them stable. So that was another like, wow. There's a whole world here of education that I need to kind of understand, or it would be interesting to learn, which sounds disgusting. But you know, like I just I want to understand what he's going through so that we keep remembering that this is the disease. And yes, he is um he's Phillip. So like I just wanted to hold and keep it precious of like, don't judge him, like the person behind there, like, you don't know him. Like, come on, give him a chance. So thank you for that, Becca.

SPEAKER_01 22:26

Because it is boy, do I ever understand that fully?

SPEAKER_03 22:30

Yeah, like come on, just separate the two of them. It's no different if the person in front of you is having a heart attack. Yeah, you would pull out all stops, right? To like help them. And um, alcoholism, whether it's the seizures or whatever they're going through, same thing. It's in the moment, though, it has master sized to this. So please help this patient. Please stop doing the judging and all that stuff. Just just help. Do what you can to help them, and then we'll work through the rest. But that part's really difficult.

SPEAKER_00 22:58

So can you uh I'm thinking of of friends of mine who have either grown up Christian or turned away from the faith, or for for one reason or another, believe there is no God. And that experience that you had driving by where your brother lives and having that the Holy Spirit talk to you. And you had you questioned it. Yeah. And there are people who go, Well, your siblings, you and your siblings are really close. So, like, of course you would feel his pain, right? But can you can you unpack that a little bit? How how did you know? And just what's your opinion on that?

SPEAKER_03 23:36

Gosh, that's one of those questions that's always hard when they say, What did your faith mean to you? And I'm like, um, everything. I so I I have a hard time like zooming out to be like, mm-hmm. I just I just prayed a lot about Philip. I grew up in the church. Uh, I grew up with I had my own separate experience where God, where Jesus literally changed my life. I promised I would change my life at a campfire my sophomore year, and he did. And so I had a close relationship with talking with Jesus. So it was frequent for me to say, you know, protect Philip today, make me attuned to anything that I can help with or or be there for. And so that was just the moment that was given to me. But of course, it was an interruption to my day where I was like, no, I'm not gonna do that. But I laugh now because you hear of all the stories about uh so many of God's, so many of Jesus' miracles, he was interrupted. Yeah. And I'm like, oh, she's got it terrible at that one. Like terrible. Efficiency is awesome, but it's a terrible God. So, anyways, I I don't know if that answers that, but just being um just being mindful of my siblings, you know. If you don't believe in Jesus, just be mindful of someone, you will get nudges. And whether you want to believe that's the Holy Spirit or not, it is, he's in our conscious. But uh listening to it is a trickier part, whether you're a believer or not.

SPEAKER_00 24:52

It is one of those things that you really can't you can't explain to a non-believer. Like you and I work, we are, we are kind of we're head thinkers, right? Would you say? And we're not pushovers, and we're not easily like convinced, you know, just oh yeah, there's a voice. It's like we think about that and go, what was that? And we're critical about it, and yet we can't explain it. And it's a real thing. Like when I turned around to go back to Heather, I can't explain it. I just I just know that there was something in me that went, You gotta go back, got work from home today. And I went, No, I don't. I don't work from home. You know, right. But something overcame my my psyche, something that I I can't justify away thinking that it was some mystical connection, you know, or like, you know, I must have saw something before I left. No, it wasn't that. It was like it was a divine intervention that he can't explain it. So I just, you know, like I think that's such a valuable people thing for people to hear. What you what you said about, you know, for people who are really struggling with their faith. And is there a God or not a God? Because that's one of those to me, a proof. Yeah, there's a God and he intervenes, he he cares about you, and he does things for you.

SPEAKER_03 26:03

And it won't be always convenient.

SPEAKER_00 26:05

Yeah. You know, like that's for kids in the car. You're kids in the car.

SPEAKER_03 26:08

Oh my gosh, I'm efficiency queen. I literally coach on it too. So I was like, we're not turning it around.

SPEAKER_00 26:13

Yeah, we got things to do.

SPEAKER_03 26:14

I was like, oh, here I am.

SPEAKER_00 26:16

Yeah. For a Fez. Do you say for a Fedora? Fedora.

SPEAKER_01 26:20

Fedora, Fedora. God knew. I mean, obviously, he is that he knows it all. And in that moment, he knew Philip needed you. He needed, needed God, and you were the vessel. Uh, your relationships with your siblings is is they're just beautiful. I love the way you talk about them, the way that you respect them every time you do, and you share the I've heard this story a couple times, and when you do share it, you say, I always want to be so respectful of my siblings because they also have a side of the story. It's probably different because it's not the same encounters and same things. But um after that moment, Becca, of the gravel road and being at your your place, how much longer after that was it where Philip just had had enough?

SPEAKER_03 27:08

Oh, um maybe a year. Maybe two, maybe maybe we got two years after the um inpatient care. I mean, this was four times in special care, you know? We had tried everything. So I always say that too, is like we lit as a family unit, we tried everything just short of an exorcism, like just everything. But there was a really beautiful thing on the back of his program of like fighting a battle every day. Every single day he fought this battle. And so rather than looking at his as a massive fail, it's like, well, let's rejoice in the victories that he had. And that would be rejoicing in the amount of days that we got to have with Philip was pretty cool. And the amount, the depth of relationships that he established, even while sometimes not fully Philip and being altered, he was amazing. Like, I can't even imagine the impact that he had on people because I know the small time he spent with people and at his funeral was unbelievable. Uh, Philip did die by suicide in 2014 and um got a terrible phone call. He had lost the battle, if you will. And the seven days following that was just, I mean, a rush of so many um feelings that are, you know, anger and sadness, but unfortunately also relief, which is a really hard one to work through because we don't have to babysit anymore or worry about them. But you don't want that for your parents, you don't want that for yourself. And it's just very, very involved. But one of the cool things, and maybe cool isn't the right words. So forgive me, Josh and Sarah, if you would pick different words, but while we were at his funeral, there would be people there that we had no idea where they came from, right? We're like, there's whoebody like we should go greet them and whatever. And this one guy, um, I think he was in one of my classes, but again, I only had two years at that new high school, so I didn't know everybody really well. But Sarah said, gosh, I feel like we should know that guy. And he came up to us and he said, I just have to tell you about uh my experience with Philip. And he said he checked him into the jail one night because um he was on that 24-7 watch where they have to blow in a um, what is that called, a breathalyzer to make sure that they're sober because he was on a watch or something like that. Anyways, and then he had to be in this holding cell while they determined if he would had been drinking or not, and he had to hand in all of his things. And so he handed this gentleman his Bible, and this gentleman has to look through the Bible very closely to make sure there's nothing in there, and he said, I've never seen a Bible so immensely filled out and so personal, and he accepted Christ because of Philip's Bible moving through his line. So you're like, Okay, like he changed a lot of people's life, and his voicemail on his phone was filled with messages from his students he was an adjunct professor as well for construction, and it was filled with messages from these college students, like Philip, can you help me with this? And can you help me with this? And so those kind of things are uh fond, you know, they make us feel good about again the Philip that we knew separate from the disease, just the coolest guy.

SPEAKER_00 30:29

Still really cool. Did you say he was in construction?

SPEAKER_03 30:31

Yes, yes, really hard worker, construction, and then um I think in construction his entire life. Engineering also, he won a couple of awards and through SDSU at the um tech college. Really smart, smart, um, good looking, really outgoing, um, but also reclusive too, because it would be too much and to handle all those emotions and stuff. I think that's why he used to kind of settle some things.

SPEAKER_01 30:57

The way that you separate the person from the disease is really beautiful because a lot of people don't know how to do that.

SPEAKER_03 31:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:04

Um, and they the the judgment that comes behind it. It is because it is so prevalent now. I mean, there is the disease, but there's also the overconsumption. There's the the crutch, you know, of the alcohol and different things and um the pull that it has on a person. Um, I have a there's a lot of people that have come into my life now that are just pleading and begging and saying, like, it is so, this is the hardest thing I've ever gone through in my entire life, and I can't do it anymore. And I'm like, just don't, please don't give up. Like, just don't give up. Like it is, it is possible. It is a forever battle.

unknown 31:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:43

I do believe that God can redeem us to the point of like taking it fully from us. I do believe that. But it is a battle, and I see it all over the place. And it doesn't matter the level of money you make to not making anything. Like it just it's like it is after you for the rest of your life, and that is daunting.

SPEAKER_00 32:04

And it's and it's countercultural. Like we've normalized alcohol like it's a normal thing. Like our US government decided it's a safe thing. And so when you hear someone who is in addiction through alcohol, you go, Well, I think uh a lot of people think, well, that's you're bad. You shouldn't have done that. You know? And what people don't understand is it's it really is, it's a disease. And I like I I believe this about Heather, the choice was taken out of our hands, or at the very least, made very, very hard. And it wasn't because of we have a choice, but it is a it is one of the hardest.

SPEAKER_01 32:43

It's one of the hardest.

SPEAKER_00 32:44

Imagine trying not to breathe for a couple minutes. Like you like you need to breathe.

unknown 32:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 32:49

Our bodies, we are wired to drink ourselves too much. It's just wired differently.

SPEAKER_03 32:52

It's just a so I had this experience similar to what you're talking about when you separate the disease from the person that really led me to dig into, like, oh man, this is its own disease outside of Philip. And um, it was another binge, and he I was at my parents' house and I was giving the kids a bath upstairs. And I got this gut feeling I needed to go downstairs. And I knew Philip had come in and I couldn't. There are two kids in the bathtub. So I was like, ah, mom. So I yelled down the stairs, Mom, can you come up? And she came on up. I didn't tell her anything. And I went downstairs and I found Philip and I was like, hey, how's it going? What are you doing? And I could tell that he'd been drinking and he was gathering up all my dad's guns. I was like, What are you doing? He's like, I'm gonna clean these. I go, No, you're not. Not tonight. And he looked at me and I looked at him, and then the battle started, like we wrestled with each other, which was not normal, not normal at all. Like, yes, we were entertaining and fun, but not this. I knew I was like, I will not let you leave this house with this gun. So he's like, knock it off. I'm just going to clean it. I'm like, I can't trust that, Philip. And you know what? I can't trust that. And so we battled back and forth until thank the Lord I have long legs. I was able to grip the long, because it was a long rifle, I was able to grip it with my legs, and basically I won, he was shorter than I was. And I got him just outside of the door before I closed the door on him, just outside of the door, and a moment of clarity, looking in his eyes, and I said, Philip, it's Becca. And he let go. He let go of the grip. So it was enough of like, there he is, there he is. And there was a moment of clarity for him where he was like, Oh my gosh, it's Becca. Shouted out the door and then came back the next day, uh, really mad, really mad. I thought he would be apologetic, and it was the opposite. He was just madder than Hops. So it's just part of the journey. But that was another clarity moment of God seeing, go downstairs. I didn't want that moment. My son had to see some of the struggle there, so that wasn't good. Yeah. Um, and my mom, my mom had to see the struggle, but I won ultimately to buy some more time. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:46

And good on you for really sticking to your guns, but you know what I mean? Like you fought for that.

unknown 34:53

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:54

What in your in that moment, where where did you find that strength to fight?

SPEAKER_03 34:59

The love? I yes, that I could see him. Like, Philip, Philip, Philip, Philip, we're gonna fight this, we're gonna fight this together. And the whole time we were fighting, if you will, I just kept thinking, I will not, I can't, I have to do this for Sarah, I have to do this for Joshua, I have to do this for my mom and dad. I will not let him leave this house. I don't care what I have to do. I will not let you leave this house with these guns. I cannot. I would not let myself live another day. We wouldn't have slept that night anyway, so I was like, I'm gonna do this. And I think he knew it too. I think he knew, like, all right, let's do this in battle. And that moment of clarity, I can still see his clear blue eyes, beautiful blue eyes. And I said, It's Becca. And he let go. He's like, Okay.

SPEAKER_01 35:36

And still came back, like you said. It's uh the chemical imbalance that the roller coaster that a alcoholic or an addict goes through with the um because he coming back, he wasn't in the same state, right? No, and so it's like there's uh this roller coaster of the chemical oh man. And to look, he Amos used to call me the alternative Heather. Yeah, not really understanding what I was going through, but he'd be like there's an and yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:08

It's tough because you you want to defend him because I know how beautiful he is and how awesome he is. And so then when people would have a different experience, I was like, no, no, no, no, no. That's try again. Like, I promise this is a guy that you want in your circle. And so some of that justification gets tiring too, you know. Cause I'm like, no, you're not, he's amazing, you know.

SPEAKER_01 36:29

Yeah, I'm really sorry that your whole family had to go through everything that they went through. But man, I just applaud you for never ever giving up on him and your entire family. Like you fought, you fought a very, very tough, tough battle. And some people will say, How can you say it was a relief? Um, I've had other people shame other people for saying that in the world of suicide. And unless you understand the battle or you helped fight it with them, you don't under you can't understand it, and that is okay. Right. So instead of shaming someone for that, I've always said if you don't understand it, um, it's probably better just not to say anything because you weren't a part of it.

unknown 37:16

Right.

SPEAKER_03 37:16

Well think of joke. Yeah, you know, like the friends were trying real hard. They could have just been silent for another seven days and we would have avoided reading seven more chapters of what the bad advice they gave him. But grieving, grieving is so difficult with suicide. And I know that grieving in other deaths is difficult as well. The suddenness of death by suicide is so alarming. And the shame behind it. I'm like, okay, the suddenness is one thing to process, but the shame from the entire audience, like even at his funeral, where you're like, just stop talking. Like, stop talking, like, do the ceremonial hug and please move on. Unless you have something amazing to tell me that I don't already know about this amazing guy. Yeah, I don't want to hear your shame.

SPEAKER_02 38:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 38:01

So that that gets me a little fired up too in the siblings, and I would laugh about like, what?

SPEAKER_00 38:06

So you mean so at the moment you're at the funeral, people coming by and they they feel the need to express how they're feeling too. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 38:15

Oh yeah. Yeah. Funeral, not so much. They were pretty kind then. It was like the conversations afterwards is people want to know, you know, like what happened, and you just have to kind of protect, and it's every situation is different, I would imagine. So we just said it was tough. It was tough and pray for my dad and pray for my mom.

SPEAKER_00 38:31

And um, how should people approach that?

SPEAKER_03 38:34

Well, I would just say, I'm so so sorry for your loss. Tell me more about them. And then if they go to the last couple of years about them, ask them to tell them earlier than that. Get to the part where it's good. Like tell me what you loved about them or her and and that kind of thing. And uh mostly just like, I'm so sorry for your loss and sit with them, which is very difficult. I totally relate to that, but less words. Less words, less words.

SPEAKER_01 38:59

Yeah. And using their name. I've heard multiple times. People want their memory to stay alive. They want the memory, the good, like you said. Tell me about the good. We all know the struggle, we know the heart.

SPEAKER_03 39:11

And tell me about when you're prompted in it, because that guy, um, the jailer, whatever his name, whatever that job is, like for him to tell us that story probably took a little bit of like, I don't know if I want to do this in this moment. Is this the right moment? But he probably, well, I don't think it was him, but the Holy Spirit prompted him, like, they need to know this story.

SPEAKER_02 39:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 39:30

Right now. Because he didn't have to attend. Who knows why he was even looking at the obituaries that day? Who knows?

SPEAKER_01 39:36

But uh th through this, what you have gone through with Philip and you have the Philip bag. The I mean, we're gonna have to, like I always say a part two because time goes so fast, but your passion for sewing and where it comes from, and you developing these beautiful, beautiful, hand-stitched, the the bags that you create, we will make sure to have your website and lead people to um the the beautiful creative side of yours. The Phillip bag is a beautiful tribute to people the the mourning of someone and the the loss of someone to keep their memory alive. Yeah. And so can you just just share a little bit about that? Because I'm super excited to to give something um that it is to come. Okay. So I'm yeah.

SPEAKER_03 40:26

Okay. Uh so I so and design purses, I believe that when you create, you have joy, whether you're creating a purse or you're creating a spreadsheet, which is the opposite of creativity, it feels like analytical. But when you're creating something, there's a joy as you're creating this. Well, in the beginning, God created it was the first verse. So I think that's where that initial joy comes in. So because I'm I love, love, love, love creating and going through this grieving process and going, why are there not more resources for, in particular, suicide? So I'll tell this part so that I can why I did the bags too, is like they have proven over and over, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention says if there are three phone calls placed strategically after an attempt, the chances of them making another attempt dive by like some like 80% or something. I will not know the exact percentage, but it's a huge percentage of it actually going down if there are three calls made within two weeks of an attempt. Well, we haven't, I don't know what the word would be. We haven't legalized that or legitimized that. We haven't like made that a thing. But like if we could, doesn't that seem simple? Like if the cops are called, then then it goes through a funnel where it's like, then a pastor calls, then a counselor calls, then a mental health person. Calls the person. Calls the person to follow up with how are you now? Doesn't even have to be handing them resources, which obviously they would do, but it's just a touch point outside of family and friends of professionals that are like, I'm still thinking about you. That was a scary moment. If those three phone calls are placed within two weeks after an attempt, the chances for another one go drastically down. Okay. So the audience just definitely needs to know that. So that's just interesting.

SPEAKER_02 42:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 42:05

And if I got involved legally, or sorry, if I got involved politically, I would like fight for that. Like we need that to start happening right away. I think that would be I know I will oversimplify it. Anyways, so going through this different grieving process and like wanting to hold on to things of his and to help people remember, like, yeah, those were his last couple of years, but this is who Philip was. And like, out of all of my siblings, he was probably the most hyper out of all of us. And I'm high energy. You should have seen this guy. He could levitate around. And um, I wanted to create a bag that I could do a portion of the proceeds to the AFSP, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, after reading some of their resources and things. And so I created this Philip bag that's just a basic tote bag, which is something that he would have carried on his construction sites. And so it was a very simple shape. Didn't matter if you're male or female, you could use this bag and take it with you. And then the inside of the bag, this started actually later, would be made from your loved one's shirt. So it'd be like a button-down shirt that we put on the inside. And um, so the project started with just creating the fillet bag, and $10 of every bag goes to the AFSP and I write the checks quarterly, going on 10 years now. And then later someone said, Could you put their shirt? I don't think that was my idea. I don't, I think someone mentioned that. And I was like, Yes. Amazing. Yes. And so now we take loved ones' shirts and we put them inside a fillet bag so that they can carry their loved one with them forever.

SPEAKER_01 43:33

And it's the liner, the lining on the inside. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 43:36

So it's like the inside, it's the good stuff for the human, anyways. Yeah. Um, so that's been a really fun project, which also led into the military project and taking military jackets for loved ones and honoring them. And again, the Philip Tote and the Honor Projects don't mean they have to have passed. It's just honoring this person. Yeah, having something tangible.

SPEAKER_01 43:54

I love this the sentiment behind all of that. It's it's uh um We went through that too after losing Amos' brother to leukemia. And it was like every time we would hold something that was his, it's like, oh, I don't wanna what do you what do you what do you what do you do with it? Like just hold it, look at it? So that's I it's beautiful to be able to put it in the colour.

SPEAKER_00 44:15

It's worth zero dollars, but it's worth a a bajillion dollars. Right?

SPEAKER_03 44:19

Yeah. That makes me think um Philip's apartment. Um he had a file cabinet that was labeled with our names in it or our kids, like he would keep letters from us or little colorings from us. And I'm like, oh my gosh, like the humanness of that is like these were his treasures.

SPEAKER_01 44:36

It's pretty cool. He probably tapped back into those in his dark moments.

SPEAKER_03 44:39

I'm sure knows I did. He was not, I always say this too, is like we don't ever feel like that he was alone in any of those moments. He loved Jesus, like he was not alone when he fought that last battle. Uh, he was not alone. He was being cradled and held and fought with.

SPEAKER_01 44:57

Man. And he's up in heaven being the exact same magnetic so many, so many reminders.

SPEAKER_03 45:04

And I'll call my siblings be like, yep, I got a reminder today, too. And it'll be like these random things. So when my clock turns 7.16, that was part of his phone number. Every time it turns 7.16, I have a Philip thought. I'm like, oh gosh, I wonder what he's doing right now. Um, and then he uh I gotta think here. Um there was a 1980s song playing shortly, like within three days of his passing. There was this 1980s song. Um, you can Amos might know it better than I do, but it's um Please Forgive Me, I Know Not What I Do. Don't make me think on the microphone. That's like, please. I don't remember it. Um, anyways, 1980s song, and I was like pounded the steering wheel. I was like, really? Dang it anyhow, Philip. And it was so like it was kind of this funny is like because I had been there for some other attempts, I had a lot of guilt of like, why couldn't I have been there for this attempt to try to prevent something? Not that I have a hero complex. I'm sure I do have a hero complex, but it was very hard for me to not have predicted that this was going to be a moment and not to have picked up on some of the signs. Um, so that really bothered me. Speaking of which, which I think people need to hear this out, is they will send some signs, and I'm sure the listening audience knows some of the signs, but one of them that really was like, I should have picked up on that, is that Philip started to call a ton of people in those last two weeks that he hadn't spoken to in quite a few years, like my cousin Toby. And Toby said, Oh my gosh, Philip gave me a call the other day, and he was so upbeat, and we just caught up. And what Philip was doing is uh tying up loose ends to make sure everybody was okay and to just cheer the other person on. He was saying goodbye, they just didn't realize it. And that is very common because they have a plan. So then they start to reverse engineer what would I do? Because now I have the plan. And so I'm gonna make sure all these people that I love know that I love them and what's special about them as they tie up their loose ends because of their plan. So that is a red flag. So when they say I'm doing really, really good, but it might have been like a really, really bad day the day before, start asking questions because that is the okay, I know the plan now.

SPEAKER_00 47:14

And what's what's what questions? What to ask? Besides there's how are you doing? And you give back the I'm fine. So then where do you go from there?

SPEAKER_03 47:23

Oh, um, I'm not the expert, so I would not be the one to ask for that. But my I they do say to be as bold as possible and do you have a plan? Yeah. Do you plan to commit to the other thing?

SPEAKER_00 47:31

But just act, do you have a plan? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 47:33

Do you have a plan? Not be afraid of the words, but please everybody find an expert better than me to do that. But yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:40

Experience sometimes is even better advice because you've experienced it. So whether you're an expert or not, I I do believe that there's why there's a lot of wisdom that God has given you as for someone that has lost a loved one. So don't discredit yourself in that.

SPEAKER_00 47:56

In the Air Force, we were told to upchannel.

SPEAKER_01 47:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:59

If we didn't have the words, if we didn't know what to say, we just feel just felt something, up channel this to someone else who does know what to do or has the authority or just and then have a just has a different relationship, can ask those questions and probably get straight answers. Yeah. I had to do that one time when someone said they're going through divorce and and so I upchanneled it and we sat down and he asked he asked the hard questions, and thankfully he's still with us today. But um and maybe is part of that conversation. But so if you don't that don't have the boldness or don't have the words, don't just stop there. Oh my gosh. Ask someone else for help.

SPEAKER_03 48:29

Part of it is like we hate being uncomfortable. Yeah, but your uncomfortableness in that moment is pretty selfish. So you have got to, I'm sorry to call it, but you will be uncomfortable. But that will be worth it if it buys you time with this loving human that you care about. So like get uncomfortable, get over yourself, get uncomfortable, work through it. And regrets is worse.

SPEAKER_01 48:53

The yeah, like the question that follows that is what do you have to lose? Right. Like the person. So let's be real. What do you want to choose?

SPEAKER_03 49:02

It'll be an interruption, it'll be uncomfortable, it'll be all those things, but it's a person's life.

SPEAKER_01 49:07

So man. Becca, you have more energy, passion, excitement for life than I mean, there's a reason that I just uh we've I've always been so drawn to you for that reason. And like um, for someone who is doing life to the fullest, and of course, like we have said, we are fallible, we have we we we're sinners, we are not perfect, but ding, I love life, and I want others to love life, and I have walked through the uncomfortable, I have been through the uncomfortable, not just that, but your own like your the stuff that is hard, even as a mom, a wife, a pay like all of it. Um protecting your children, standing up for your children. Like you have gone to battle a lot, and I love that about you. And you go to battle for people that you don't even know. Hence your podcast, The Encourager, hence your um, you've created an entire program to help women because you understand the how tough it is for women to walk through being moms, wives, uh, entrepreneur, uh, your creative side, and we can so easily fall short with the not fall short, but like just the exhaustion that can put us in a really tough place. And so as we wrap up here, I just want you to um I want it, and it's not even a self-promotion, but uh selfishly that is okay. I really believe in my heart that you have something to offer anybody who is searching for the beauty and the joy that comes from Christ, marriage, kids, all of it. There is this yumminess that comes from you because you've done the work. And so can you do that? Can you plug what you're doing, why you're doing it?

SPEAKER_03 50:59

Well, I would say this when I end my Facebook live events for Rebecca Scott Designs, I always say, if you wonder where all the light and energy comes from, it's Jesus. Know him, love him, and pursue him. So when anybody says, like, man, you're really energetic, where does this come from? I point them straight to Jesus because that's what it is. I I can't even drink a lot of caffeine, I would just levitate. So the only way that I can explain that is that it's Jesus. Like all the things that I've been through and the bounce back and the things that drive me in the passionate world for podcasting is that I think there's a lot of messages out there that we can't do both home and work life. We have to choose between the two, whether it's hourly or daily or weekly. It's like today I was a fantastic business woman. I killed it. Man, I was a terrible mom today. And then it'll be the reverse. And I don't think that you have to do that. I am living proof that you don't have to do that. And the key piece in the last couple of years has really developed is like, I think you can do it with joy, but stop believing this grind stuff. So I really dial in on my podcast, and when I'm coaching women, is to help them really find their joy spot, like where it is, is it in the creative process, which it is, but what is it that you're creating? And that undoing the messaging that you got to choose. I think you can do both. I mean, I was told a lot of messages that I couldn't be a designer in the Midwest. I'd have to move to the coastlines. Um, jokes on you. Look at me. So, like there, I feel passionate about telling people like, don't let anybody tell you what you can and you can't do. Yeah, like, come on, let's talk about it. So limiting. Yeah. So limiting. Yes, especially when they say, that's a great big dream. I love your dream. Hey, wait until he's five when he's in school. And I'm like, what why would you say that? If they if the Holy Spirit has put something on your heart, or even it's just your big dream of whatever, and it doesn't even have to be whole and ice. It's just like, I just really want to do this. Great, let's talk about it. Let's break it down. I think that you can do all things at 1%, which we can. I mean, 1% is one sentence, one Google search, one phone call, one email. So the majority of my coaching is just reminding women that you can do both really well, both home and work life, and you can do both with a ton of joy behind it as well, especially when you're leaning into how God uniquely created you. Speaking of trademarks, I did trademark the phrase, own who you are, because I think it's really important that women do live into that and stop becoming what the world tells us we should become, or whatever the thing is, like who you are is just awesome. So let's just own that. And then I like developing that in women. So I created a couple different programs. You can listen to my podcast, but I also have a cohort that started in January. And this I really feel like is the strongest point after eight years of podcasting that I think is gonna be the best, most momentous um group because it's just 10 women. It's limited to 10 women, and it's coaching every single week for 10 weeks on my systems. So I think all of us, whether we're male or female, have these five pillars, if you will, of systems. You have a me system, how you're taking care of yourself. How do you get a full charge? Everybody's different. You know, mine is gonna be Jesus and Burpees. Some people's an app. That's okay. That's okay.

SPEAKER_04 53:55

Jesus and Burpees.

SPEAKER_03 53:56

Yeah, Jesus and Burpees. We were good friends. And then there's a food system answering the question, what's for supper? Because that that lays on us all day long. There's a lot of mental bandwidth around that question. And then there's your home system, making your home a sanctuary. When you walk in that door, that you're not like, duh, I got all these tiny chores to do, which you might, but I'll help coach you to like get some systems set up so it feels more like a sanctuary and less like another to-do list. Then there's a family system, and that I want to build very, very foundationally with this women, with these women, because if your home and your family are set up for success, the business will be an amazing thing. But those two things need to be set up for success so that the business can't accelerate. And I don't think they can do either. It can for a certain amount of time until one falls apart. So we don't want your family and your home system to fall apart. So we set up really firm foundations for those. And then the last one is your work system, which we all love, especially if you're a doer like me. Like that's answering the questions who am I working with? What am I working on? How am I gonna do it? Why am I doing this? All those. So the work system, everybody that I coach really likes that part because we kind of know how to do that. But I make them go through the other systems first so that those are firm foundations so we can accelerate the business.

SPEAKER_00 55:02

Nice. You're mad fun. That sounds great.

SPEAKER_03 55:04

Love it. The best part about it too is like, yes, I'll give you examples of how I do it because people want to know you have four kids, 20 employees, and you farm and ranch. How is this happening, right? So I'll give you examples, but I will be hyper-watching these 10 women to find out where their face lights up. And when I say food system, if they glaze over, I'm like, great, you do not like cooking, do you? And like, no. Like, okay, well, then let's figure out what your food system is, because it may not be you cooking, but we still need to make some decisions because we do all have a food system. So I love that this environment will be a very um intimate environment for me to pick up on the cues of like, wait a minute, that is the third time you have said this about yourself, and that is not true. So this group right now, we need to affirm this woman. And so I'm really excited about it.

SPEAKER_00 55:48

Is this over Zoom or is this in person?

SPEAKER_03 55:49

It's over Zoom.

SPEAKER_00 55:50

Yeah. And how can where can people find the next cohort?

SPEAKER_03 55:53

Yes. Um, you can sign up at the encouragerpodcast.com and look for the cohort um tab at the top.

SPEAKER_04 55:59

Great.

SPEAKER_01 56:01

So the the last thing I want to lead into that, um, because we did we are out of time. Amos is like, no, no, no, there's not one more thing. Nope.

SPEAKER_00 56:12

Um Did I gaff about that, Bob?

SPEAKER_01 56:15

Can I uh everybody has to have I I f this is something I will stand behind and I will dig my heels in that everybody every single person needs to be learning and growing or they're dying.

unknown 56:27

True.

SPEAKER_01 56:28

Because if you are not and you are just going through the mo the motions and you're like, oh, this isn't working. Oh, my family, oh, it's like, okay, hold up. So who does Becca go to? Who have you gone to as someone that you love and admire and look up to? Because the joy comes from the Lord, but you have to also have accountability. So who are you, who do you tap into, Becca?

SPEAKER_03 56:49

Oh, my husband. He's always a very good, like, cheerleader, believe it or not. And people if they know Nick are like, he's a cheerleader. Yep, he doesn't ever tell me to get a job, so that's good. He rides away with me. So Nicholas is a good source of like um discernment for me, also. He'll sniff it out long before I do because I'm so enthusiastic. So he's one of my like good advisors, Joshua and Sarah, both my siblings, full of joy, full of trauma as well. And um, we like to encourage one another. I love Bob Goff. Bob Goff, to me, he dreams really big. And half of the dreams that he've accomplished has not been by earning millions, which he does. And so he's a big inspiration. I just got to talk with him this week. He's awesome. Like he dreams at the size that I will be at one point. And then um I'm really enjoying, just recently, really enjoying Megan Fate, um, because tragedy and trauma and grief and mostly grief in her life has really um helped me to still process. Okay. How do you spell her last name? I think you guys might have to look this up. F-A-T-E, Megan Fate.

SPEAKER_01 57:53

Fate, like the the actual okay. I think let's look it up. Megan Fate. Okay. That's one I haven't heard of, so I I appreciate that. I love when I learned. I think I sent it to you. Did you? Okay. I probably did listen to it then. Okay. Because anything you send me, I listen to. Me too. Vice versa. Okay. One other thing too. If you cannot, like we, we, you and I had talked about since I'm a fundraiser and I love fundraising, I love supporting people, I love finding ways to financially help people grow. That is such an important thing because I believe that finances are not the end-all be-all. Why, why, because people will say, well, I just don't have the money for it. But nope. I am like 1% that baby. There will be somebody who wants to see you grow and it takes just a simple ask. And so I'm going to be bold and ask if you're a business leader or you are somebody who is out there that has a wife, a friend, a mom, an aunt, I don't care who it is, that you're thinking, man, they could really use some Becca. They could really use some Rebecca. The course and this cohort will change your life. It will change their life. If you want to see the people you love around you grow like crazy, pay the money to put them through this cohort. And a business can sponsor their employees. There is educational leadership out there. She is worth it. And your employees and those you love are worth it.

SPEAKER_03 59:15

It's interesting. And you could put the same thing concepts together. If you want them to be more joyful in your workplace, we do the practical things that allow them that freedom to be joyful. I know it sounds simple, but we are ninjas at the practical things so that the joy can be huge when they get to the workplace.

SPEAKER_01 59:31

I see companies putting thousands and thousands of dollars in sales training. Gross. If you have a person who has this ability to do sales but doesn't have the time, the attention, or the bandwidth to do it because their home life and their marriage and all these things is just not clicking.

SPEAKER_04 59:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 59:49

You get that right, dude. Your salesperson will take your company and duh double it's somebody just by getting it.

SPEAKER_03 59:56

Just remove what's for supper. You'll get an extra hour out of them every day. Surprise.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:01

Life doesn't stop when you walk in the front door of work.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:03

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:04

Like all that stuff comes with you.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:06

Especially as a woman. Yes. I mean, I'm sure for men, but especially as a woman.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:10

You also are a speaker. So if there's anybody who's looking for someone like you to stand in front of a crowd and just amp them up and sort of wildfire. Becca and yes. Gosh, can you imagine both of us on stage? We would like. Burpee challenge.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:24

Oh, that sounds awful. I would say, I just say I think burpees were created at the fall.

unknown 1:00:32

Could be.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:33

This is how I feel about it. Gosh, this has been so good. So good. So we'll get your information out there, Becca. We will be able to have people follow up with you. You are, even though you were a mystery to me, you are you make yourself available to those that really do want to excel and just love the Lord the way that you do, the way that we all do. It's like, come on. So we appreciate that you make yourself available even to our audience today. Just you are um just proving that you are the light of the world because God shines through you. It's a beautiful thing. So thank you.

SPEAKER_03 1:01:08

Thank you. Um remember to listen to the tiny nudges. As that was brought up several times here. So I would just advise everybody those tiny nudges, please stop. Stop, listen. It'll prevent some things. That's great.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:19

Thanks for watching. Thank you. Thank you so much for listening. We want to change lives through this podcast. And if you want to support this podcast or our guests, please see the links below for our Patreon and giving links.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:30

And like and subscribe and also share our podcast as much as possible. Thank you.